Many years ago, before my regular doctor moved her practice out of town, I was being treated, and taking meds, for depression and anxiety. Being the curious sort, I googled depression so I could learn more. Of course that lead to the desire to read and learn about other mental challanges. During this period of personal research, I discovered one disorder that discribed me so closely that it was scary. OCD. Once a thought or image enters my head, it's there. No matter how hard I try, I cannot move on until I feel it's resolved. It's annoying, but doesn't become a problem unless the issue cannot be resolved. In those cases, I have to constantly remind myself not to give in to the fears that occur when I allow myself to exaggerate the seriousness of the thought. Despite this tendancy to obsess, I've still never believed I actually have OCD, because of one important detail. I've never engaged in compulsive behavior. One can't have OCD without the C...
It was probably two or three days ago. I found a pattern in one of my knitting magazines for a beautiful, breezy summer shirt. I decided to knit this top using the Comfy yarn in my stash. Comfy is a beautifully soft pima cotton/micorfiber blend yarn from Knit Picks. The only problem is that the yarn is black. Now, I didn't think I had a problem with black yarn until I started knitting this up. As my project grew, I noticed cat hair stuck to the fabric. I carefully picked out the cat hairs, and continued knitting. I look down just a few minutes later to see more cat hair. I stopped to pick that off, and continued knitting, only to look down again to see more cat hair...Well, you can see where I'm going with this...
Of course, I could knit the whole top, then run a tape roller over the finished project, but I guess that would be too reasonable a solution, because I can't make myself do it. I can't stop picking the hairs as I go. As I'm trying to make myself stop, I realized something. Could obsessive cat hair picking be a C? Do I actually have OCD? Actually I don't think so, but it is a pretty scary thought.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
I would think you would be so adjusted to cat hair not to even see it, however it is hard to ignore on black. so clean as you go and you will still have to clean when your done...lol
ReplyDeleteLove you
I once heard it preached..never claim a disease or condition..for instance, never say MY asthma is acting up. for then you claim it as yours...it impressed me so much I am careful never to lay claim to aches and pains...they may be there, but they are NOT,nor will ever be mine. They are intruders in my life.
ReplyDeleteI'm don't think I'm really claiming anything, but it would be denying reality not to be a little conserned.
ReplyDeleteMy feeling is if you recognize a thing you can fight it or at least be on even ground with it. I am one, who hates to be left in the dark, or the last one to know. Denying it would be dumb but to fall comfortably for it's wiles is another thing. I like that you used the word concerned instead of worried. Worry is a very bad thing..I fight it all the time. I recognize it for sure.
ReplyDeleteWorry is my worst problem. I guess I'm not really worried, because I still don't think I have the disorder. We all have some characteristics of these illnesses, it's only if the thoughts take over your life that you may actually have something.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was reading about all those mental illnesses, I found a site that gave tips on how to talk yourself down from an anxiety episode. I can't always make it work, but I'm getting better at it.
:) i hear ya both! Lord help me!
ReplyDeleteI do a few things that could go under the heading of compulsive.
ReplyDeleteI think that is a wonderful thing you found about talking yourself down from the anxiety. I feel that is what the Bible was saying when it tells us to take our thoughts into captivity and think on good things...etc. That is what I do. Pray and talk to God. Sometimes it works real quick and my thoughts head right straight back to the good and other times it may take days, hours or even longer to talk myself around but I do believe that is the key.
I believe God will honor your efforts. You know the saying goes practice makes perfect try try again. LOL.
God bless.
:) Good advice, Zita. We really do need to get a handle on the things that keep our mind cluttered. Yes, I mean ME. too
ReplyDeleteHope this will let me post. I am having trouble again